Some of you know that, in addition to being a devoted Jetthead, I also happen to be a KStew-loving, “Team Edward”-bracelet-owning Twi-hard. (I’m too embarrassed to wear that bracelet in public, but that’s beside the point.) As such, I have read many rants in the KStew/Twilight fandom both for and against Kristen’s “Joan Jett Mullet.” But every Jetthead and I know that Kristen’s haircut cannot be classified as a mullet because Joan Jett never had a mullet. Joan Jett had a shag. And now I’m going to waste several hours proving it for people who don’t care. Because that’s how I roll.
I don’t comment about this on my favorite Twilight/KStew sites out of respect for the fans, because I don’t want anyone to think that I’m posing as a Twi-hard to sell Joan Jett crap to a new audience. Trust me, if I weren’t butt-crazy in love with Twilight, Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, and all the stuff that goes with them, I wouldn’t give any of them the time of day. My diehard gene is pure. So, I am posting my rant about this on my own site in the hopes that someone, someday, will Google this shit and finally learn the truth. I almost hate to post this here, because I don’t want the five Jettheads that read this blog to think I’m using it to promote Twilight either. But backlash be damned! I can no longer be silent.
I repeat: Kristen Stewart and Joan Jett do not have mullets. I’m going to help take the emotion out of this heated debate and wow you with my nerdy-ass logic at the same time by breaking this down “Geometry Proof” style.
Follow my nerdy-ass logic after the jump.
GIVEN: Kristen Stewart cut her hair to mimic Joan Jett for The Runaways movie.
PROVE: Kristen Stewart does not have a mullet.
Statements |
Reasons |
1) In a mullet haircut, the top and sides are short and the back is long. The back is significantly longer than the front. | 1) Definition of a mullet. |
2) A shag haircut has gradual layers. | 2) Definition of a shag haircut. |
3) Joan Jett had a shag haircut. | 3) Joan Jett’s hair had gradual layers, the definition of a shag.![]() |
4) Joan Jett did not have a mullet. | 4a) Joan Jett had a shag haircut. 4b) Searching for Joan Jett’s name at mulletmadness.com yields NO search results. |
5) Kristen Stewart plays Joan Jett in The Runaways, and cut her hair to look like Joan. | 5) Given. |
6) Kristen Stewart has a shag haircut. | 6) Kristen’s hair matches Joan Jett’s hair, which is a shag. |
7) Therefore, Kristen Stewart does not have a mullet. | 7) Joan Jett did not have a mullet. |
End of Proof.
No, I will not be getting a life anytime soon. 😀
(Thanks to Jettrocker, whose tweet gave me the idea for this post.)
BRAVA!
Lol, thanks! I hope the powers that be see it someday. (And by that, I mean the people who regularly write about Kristen’s hair, lol.)
Thanks for clarifying this one, it was really pissing me off!!!!!!!!!!!! Being a Hairstylist I don’t use the term “mullet” lightly and Joan in NO way EVER had one!
Thank goodness, for a while I thought I was the only one!
Your site rocks!
Thanks!
I love this! I agree, Joan didn’t have a mullet. And, I actually love Kristen’s hair. I did crazy stuff with my hair when I was a teenager. That’s when you do that kinda stuff. I think Kris totally embraces the shag. *winks*
There’s been similar arguments that David Bowie during his Ziggy Stardust faze did not sport a mullet either. I think that ruling was that he was simply too fabulous to have his hair deemed such a lowbrow style. lol. I agree in that case as well. Then again, if you look at my name, I’m slightly biased.
A few years ago I had a girlfriend who referred to “groovy mullets.” I was a few years older and baulked at the idea that a mullet could ever be “groovy.” I realise now that the grooviness she referred to, and she and her princess-rich LUGgy friends had their hair cut in the style of, was a shag.
Thanks for fighting the good fight….!
You’re welcome! Thanks for finding this post. It’s one of my favorites. 🙂
I can see why! Love what you’re doing here; thank you.